Monday, October 01, 2007

People can never change.

Of course they do change! Everyone changes, physically and mentally. But do you really believe that people can change their personality? I don’t think so…

I know most of you guys won’t agree with me on this one…one will say “my girlfriend was so kind and loving and later she had changed somehow”…others will say “he was a ‘partey’ before but now he is a genuine religious being”…or ‘my husband/wife has changed and left me with our kids. He/she doesn’t love us anymore’…blah…blah…blah.

Let’s go a little deep into this. How many of you have a bro, who abuses you verbally and emotionally, including trivial nit-picking criticism? Or a sis, who manipulates you or other members of the family, through her emotions and beliefs, attitudes and perceptions? Or a mom, who is a constant fault-finder who refuses to value, and acknowledge you? Or a dad, who isolates you, controls over your choice of friends and blames you for all the terrible things that happen in the family? This may not be true for all. You may be a very lucky person whom everyone treats as a prince/princess. In that case think about your own personality. (I will talk about your personality later. First let’s talk about your family members).

In any of the cases I mentioned above, I am sure the victim must have tried in every possible way to make things right and earn the love of his/her parents/siblings, hoping them to change their attitudes towards him/her. But when you are almost sure that you have succeeded, they will do something awful that makes all your hopes vanish into thin air. That will go on forever, even when they are ill and helpless, even when they are on their way to see the other side, as long as you live with them (sometimes even if you are not). Do you know why? Because, that is, their personality. They simply cannot change it. Some people, if they realize their fault, might try to change it. But no matter how hard they try, at the end they will still be the same. The question is…how many of you can say for certain that your parents/siblings have changed? Answer it yourself.

Enough about family members! Let’s talk about people around you. I’m going to share one of my own experiences.

There is this close friend of mine. He was a very outgoing, ‘fun to hang around’ type of guy. He always had 2-3 girls under his wing (if you know what I mean). Our ‘gang’ used to have so much fun. And then he became an extremely religious person. Growing of the beard and all the other changes came to him overnight. He started lecturing us regarding all kinds of religious stuff. Gradually he started drifting away from us and our friendship abated slowly.

One day, after sometime, I saw him walking on the walkway of a street with his usual ‘yo yo’ walk. The beard was GONE! He saw me and stopped. I went to where he was standing with this obvious big grin on my face and he smiled back at me and asked ‘what?’

‘What happened to your beard?’ I could not keep myself from asking.

‘You know what happen to tides in the sea?’ was his answer.

…to be continued…


s[u]jau said...

people can change.. but people wont

moyameehaa said...

welcome back. :D

i think "change is inevitable except from a vending machine".yes there are changes in personality.personality is a combination of many things regarding our is influenced by our environment,mental abilty and attitude,our beliefs and lil bit of genetic inheritance too i guess. some things are inborn in our nature,which would be difficult to change.but people have changed so much...i dont even believe they are the same people.but some things about people remain constant.the beard example is a change in belief and way of thinking.If he remained with the same beliefs he was sticking to with the beard.. he would remain like that forever.change occurs when the environment or circumstances change. change can be brought consciously.personality is sometimes like a mask we wear.we can change it.but again i also think there are somethings which are hard to change (i wont say impossible).

and about the family or friend's attitude towards one...i would say it depends on what kinda personality they see in you.but once they fix something abou you (upon which depends how they treat you) it would be difficult to change it.i think after being away from them for sometime you can change it...and they might accept you new personality after givin you lot of the bottmline is that people do change but some changes are difficult to bring requires a lot of training ,will power,change in environment,beliefs...etc etc.

Anonymous said...

sometimes change is like footprints in the sand which the wave washes away. other times its like the craggy rock which is polished smooth by the constant force of the waves. one kind is temporary, phasic, superficial. the other kind is long-lasting and inherent.

Ameer said...

ah! ah! long long paragraphs of comments about change. I just want to say that the pic is cool and tells it all.

monchi said...

@moyameehaa: I thanx for the welcome...but i totally disagree with u...prove your argument...answer my questions.

@ameer: thanx

Mulhadhevi said...

wel come back bro....i ve no coment on this. hehehe